Lost

Well, not trying to be emotional or what, somehow feel quite lost in life recently. Everyday past by so quickly that I have no time to do some deep thinking. Lots of thoughts came to mind, wondered why I am in this state suddenly. Many things I planned for did not proceed as planned. University plans, plans to be more vocal and brave, plans to be more mature. Perhaps we cannot possibly live our life as planned, I was so foolish. Though everyday is happy, as everyone in the family is safe and I am healthy, somehow when I thought of all these plans, I get disillusioned.

Life during my younger days was more innocent and less stressful. When one grows older, we cannot do everything to the best we want, we need to set priorities. Nevertheless, to be alive is a blessing, too many unpredictable events, terrorism, natural mishaps, health problems, and too many possible events to take our lives away. Just like we never know when we are born, we never know the exact time and date when we have to leave this world. We are too busy at times to reflect on our actions, to meditate, to attain tranquility in our minds.Read some books on emotional intelligence before, they advocate that we should have time to reflect on out actions and have some time to meditate. In the past, thought that meditation is too abstract for many to accept, now find that everyone of us is capable of doing that. If we put in effort to do that everyday, I believe we will feel more at ease.

I don't know how many people are like me, prefer to believe in a more ordered life, every year we need to do certain things, like working by a certain age, I know it is boring but I feel terrible is my life isn't going as planned. That is why I feel lost now. Well, guess I need to reflect on this "weirdness", if not I will only make me unhappy. Alright, I end here now.