Finally it is coming

Heard from my family members that the A levels results will be released on Wednesday 010306. I am not as anxious as I expect myself to be perhaps due to the events in camp. Still, I am much more nervous than the time when I first get the results. I have worked hard for it and I definitely want to do well for it. However, I somehow expect myself not to do very well, perhaps a bit better than the previous time. I try not to predict what grades I will get but still in my mind I just have a guage. I am on tenterhooks and the feeling is really uncomfortable.The difference this time round is I worked hard for it and even if I did badly, even worse than the previous attempt, I know what it is like to put to effort for something. I have not put in so much effort in my life before, and I sort of think that 70 per cent of those who worked hard for something get the results they want, the remaining 30 per cent will not get it.

I don't know what to do sometimes, be it good or bad or just plain, I tell myself to be more brave than the previous time and try to plan for my future. Of course, I can say all these now, who knows how I will react when I know the results. it is a really strange feeling, partly nervous, partly despondent and partly indifferent. Hope that I can be brave enough to face up to the consequences. Alright, I end here now.

Half a Year more to ORD

Yup! Still have a half a year more to go before I ORD. Half a year(184 days to be exact) is neither long nor short, a lot can happen in this remaining half a year. No matter what, I just hope that I can ORD in one piece and my family members are safe. In 2 weeks time, I guess last year A levels results will be released and I am feeling quite nervous about it, far more compared to 2 years ago. I have put in really a lot of effort in it and I hope to do well.

Tuesday was Valentime's day and as usual I was alone. In the past, never thought that the day could be significant but after knowing the person I like already have a state, i suddenly feel so useless. I tell myself not to have a gf till the age of 25 but it seems like when you see everyone else have a partner, you would feel so weird. Anyway, I know no matter what I won't be serious in a relationship till I get every of my wish fulfilled so why cause pain to others and myself when I am not willing to commit in a relaionship. I end here now.

An eventful week

This week in camp it is really busy. Starting from Monday, it is a lot of work till Tuesday.
On Wednesday, I am the duty clerk and on THursday I am forced to wake up early because of a blackout in the ops room, depriving me further of my already precious sleep. On tHursday, we have a CNY celebration and it is quite fun. yesterday, it is normal. Today, just have steamboat with my family members and this afternoon just bought an mp3 player. Also realized that the O levels results had been released yesterday, don't know when the A levels results will be released. Never mind just have to wait, I end here now.

Results stress

in about 3 more weeks, last year's A levels results is going to be released. Though it is the second time I am getting it and I sort of still disbelieve that I actually have to go through this ordeal one more time, I am more nervous than ever. If I fail this time, it is not the end of the world but I will be really sad. Aiyah, very sian and very uncomfortable, on one hand I want to get the results, on the other hand, I don't want to face the music. I really don't know what I want? Anyway, I tell myself to be strong whatever the outcome is.

Chinese New Year Celebration

What a boring CNY! I guessed I am the one to blame for spoiling my CNY. I don't know why I am so vexed. I thought I can put off everything and enjoy my new year but I can't. In 5 weeks time Iam going to get my A-levels results, I am nervous and scared at the same time. What if I do badly, What if I cannot take it What if I sink into depression again.
There are far too many "what if"s I don't want to think about it anymore, I just want to enter U that is all, is it too much to ask for? Is it? I end here now.

jing di zhi wa( Myopic guy)

Yesterday, just went to Marina Bay to have a steamboatcum barbecue cum buffet dinner. There are altogether ten of us ( Chin, Zhuo, Adrian, Kenny,Royce, myself, Larry, Junhong, Joseph and Ivan). On the journey there, I thought about my new year resolution. I dun know, I know I have brighten up a lot but somehow thre seem to be something missing. I know I will always be this myopic and low self esteem guy. I will always be this jing di zhi wa, kinda sad but I am really happy to have everything I yearn for. Does looks really play a vital part in a person's life? Or am I too concerned with looks? nevermind, I just want to be a normal guy, that's all.

Heck Care Attitude

All of the sudden, nothing excites me nor upsets me, I become so indifferent in such a short period of time. Yestserday, just performed duty clerk, luckily, it was peaceful. I am always this lucky when it comes to doing duty. There are indeed unpleasant incidents and people but what is the use of brooding over them. Just 32 weeks, I am going to ORD, the feeling is strange. Now the most important thing is my results which I will be getting on the first week of March. If everything turns up well, then, there isn't anything for me to feel vexed over anymore.
For the past 1 year 8months, it has been a tumultous period, with extremely happy incidents and extremely irritating incidents. There are inevitably some people whom I provoke and even hurt during this period. I am sorry for being insensible and childish and over paranoid.Nothing more to add, just that I can ORD in one piece with my family anf friends safe and sound.

8 Months to ORD

In exactly 8 months time, I am going to ORD. By then i don't know whether I will be studying in University. Hopefully, I can study in NTU and be a student again. 2005 have been a fruitful year for me, a lot of wonderful things happen and I even retook my 'A' levels exam in November. A new type of job environment and a chance to go overseas all seem like a dream to me. this year have also been quite peaceful globally, it is also the full 1 year in NS for me. i have aslo thought a lot about myself.

A big thank you to those who make this year a wonderful year for me.

65 weeks to ORD

In about 450 days, it is my ORD and I have been in the Army 402 days. How time flies, 450 days more and I am free from NS liability for the time being. By then, no more Sundays book in and I can sleep at home everyday. It is really true that if you don't think so much, time passes by quickly. 5 months has passed since the start of the year, and many of my friends had ORD, Soon, it will be my turn and 2 years would have passed just like that. It is a special kind of experience that most guys in Singapore have to undergo, it is sort of mandatory too.

1 Year in the Army

It has been 1 year 1 month and 5 days in the Army, I become more open and make a lot of friends during this span of time. i am really satisfied with my life currently, too bad I still haven't received any news ffrom either of the three local Universities. At first, I thought that i am going to have a miserable 2 years 4 months in the Army, but this past 1 yera proved otherwise.
Now I am just waiting for acception into the 'U'. if i failed, I have to think of other alternatives.

Back from Thailand

After being in Thailand for 16 days, I am finally back in Singapore. It is quite an experience hough the weather is really hot. I will always remember the happy times spent there. I bought a lot of stuffs for my family and relatives. this trip is really a good experience.

Going to Thailand

2 days later, I am going to Thailand, never been to Thailand before, wonder how is the weather like? Heard it is very hot, but I am already prepared. Have to leave my family and singapore for more than 2 weeks, quite sad but nevermind it is an experience.

first timer

Hi, everyone, it is my forst time writing in Blog, hope that it will be successful.